Brains of the Issue

While we are still collecting the information from the medical screening, we have moved onto the brains of the issue.

Christina has been evaluated by Dr Federici, a Russian-speaking American, who by the grace of god works about half-an-hour from our home (http://www.drfederici.com). He has been working with these kind of children for over twenty years and has been giving us some great advice on how to approach them in a consistent and effective manner.

Getting your head around the world these kids have come from is a bit challenging. I have taken to calling it, "doing time in kiddie prison." While other kids my have been watching Barney the singing dinosaur, Christina was suffering collective punishment in a class full of children the same age. She developed no skills of decision making, since she had no decisions to make. She would change her underwear and clothes once a week on wash day, the same day she would bathe and wash her clothes.

Then we had Sasha and Tanya evaluated by Dr Boris Gindis, an American-speaking Russian, at the BG Center (http://www.bgcenter.com) in Nanuet New York. Each evaluation is a very detailed assessment of each of the children, administered in their native language to give the best picture of their strengths and weaknesses before the switch to English makes this almost impossible to determine.

We havehad the good fortune to havethe University of Minnesota international adoption clinic take on Maxim for a visit next month. These visits are building the book we will use to chart their educational and treatment plans.

Now a funny one from the past:
During the poopka patrol in service of our medico's work ups. So Heidi had just gotten our smallest one to provide her first sample and was being very proud of her produced sample. But then, as Heidi was distracted for a moment, the sample waiting by the front door for an unguarded moment;

"Ajo! (The dog) get out of that!" ...and with a bark, a hustle by mom and a wail of dismay from the proud sample provider, the evening just got a little more exciting.

Well, when the dust settled and the sample viles where filled, all was mostly good with the world. But Tanya will not look at Ajo ever quite the same.

Now, with both Heidi and I on the sick list today, Masha herded the kids to the car this morning, but only after the cossacks extracted a blood promise to make the big jump tomorrow.

Drum roll please... 3 bikes from the thrift store - $30. Helmets, safety checks and training wheels - $300;  dora the explora Band aids and bactine, priceless. Our buddy Clinton is heading over ready to give the Lance Armstrong school of hard knocks to these little hard heads on the two wheel (plus two) training ground tomorrow.

Erik, the much harassed.... Papa

Coming and Going

Well, well... the week's thoughts focus on the ins and outs of our life these days.

First the Ins:
When the kids came to us, they had a very "institutional taste buds" at the dining table. They turned down almost all sauces and melted cheese concoctions. Of course Christina led the "turn it down before you taste it" charge. Bare noodles, rice or potatoes went down well, but au gratin, lasagna or (very yummy) spaghetti, PB and J all met resistance, more or less.

The added bonus to blessings of the delivered dinners so many wonderful folks from our church brought over, they reflected many approaches to cooking and styles of preparation. We have also developed our skills of presenting and incentive-ising new tastes and textures. It is now a bit of a game to get them to try a small piece.

With time, we have been able to split up the "Nyet block" a bit at a time. Sasha and Tanya have been crossing the picket line more and more often.

So on Thursday, we had a bit of an Americana break-through in the junk food department. Masha and I took the three of them to Jimmy T's, a Capitol Hill favorite diner.

So we ordered open-faced peanut butter & jelly sandwiches and french fries for them. We actually convinced them to try a sample sandwich or two. They worked over the fries, with Sasha even trying ketchup (what a wild boy he is). Then they surprised us by digging into the onion-rings the grown ups had ordered. Then, the moment of truth, the corn dog came.

They passed it around and discussed what it may be made of, how, and where to bite it to find out. Wow, another success! These darn American swine make some things that are a tad better than porridge. 

And now for the outs.
We have been doing a complete work-up on the kids these last few weeks. The labs have been keeping us in constant contact with doctors. Intestinal parasites and other issues with inoculations and other tests pop-up routinely with these kids. So, as brand new parents we have a little kid medicine to catch up on. The favorite, so far, is the stool-sample regime. We have to collect three samples from each brave kinder and place them in a separate set of tubes, each. For those weak in math, that is nine samples loaded into 18 separate vials.

We had to get a score card going to keep track of the hero's work. Tanya is the bashful one coming in last and Sasha was the trooper, delivering the goods right up front. After the consultation Thursday with the Doc, it looks like the gang is due for another blood draw for a titers work-up to fill in some of the holes in the first screening. Good thing they like stickers, cuz they are collecting a bunch of them (that is the prize when they complete the shots and blood draws).

Erik and Heidi

First Corndog

The first corn dog, at Jimmy T's

(ain't cellphone cameras fun?)

4th Weekend of the American Family

This week's wrap-up is a confusing hustle of activity to a novice parent. It includes haircuts, doctor visits, blood draws, cartoon band-aids, and lots of stickers.

Our second trip to the family pool in near by Maryland. My family had a tradition of "Swim Night" on Fridays, started as a special schedule to get the kids to the University of Michigan's pool for a family swim time. In my recollection, years later in southern California, it was a first-come first-serve meal time. Our own swim night ritual of going to this wonderful facility with the three kids.

Our church has been incredible! Since we have been home, we have been assisted by so many wonderful people who have brought wonderful dinners by for us. In the bleak hours of the first weekend, Pastor Heather asked us how she could help us, Heidi and I are not too good at asking for help you see. She suggested meals as a service that people could help us with.

What a wonderful blessing, as we struggled those first days to stabilize the chaos. And as things calmed down, not having the time or mental energy to plan and prepare our dinner meals. Time and again, friendly faces at the door would bring in not only the food to nourish us but their concern and compassion. Just being able to share our story and in many cases give weekly updates as they returned with new labors of love for us.

The most picturesque effort was a carefully-crafted rendition of the United States and the Ukraine in Pizza! There where so many wonderful and nutritious meals all crafted and delivered with love and kindness. This has been such a blessing, since these meals have given us more time to focus on getting the children through all the hoops of school entry. Most nights we have just been able to collapse at the end of a full day.

Some of the weeks highlights in pictures:

The Ukraine Pizza!

Getting Go-to-school haircuts.

Our new school uniforms. 1&2

The new look.

Dance Concert in the Kitchen - and the dog gets in it too!

With a new-found respect for love,

Erik & Heidi

Note: These photos, along with all others posted in this blog, are also available for viewing HERE, and for print orders at Costco. Please comment with your photo request and we'll send you the Costco link.

The New Look

Tada!  The new look!

Photo Reminder - all the photos posted throughout our blog are also available for viewing online by clicking HERE. And for those who like "real" photographs, just drop us a note in the comments (below), and we'll send you an "invitation" to select photos and order prints from our album on the Costco Photos site.

Impression

Monday, 23 February 2009

So, last night I was lying in bed thinking about the impression that was made on me by meeting someone.

This someone spent half of their life in a physically abusive relationship, only to be utterly abandoned to spend the other half incarcerated. The things I have have learned from this person have made me question all of my assumptions about life, belief and priorities. I have learned more about grace, prayer and hope than I ever knew. All this since I came to know this person.

I have also experienced sacrifice, trust and desperation to levels beyond my experience. I have seen people risk their livelihoods, respect and self worth for this person.

This person is the six-year-old girl sleeping in our bed last night. Tanya, asleep and wriggling gently in the covers as we close out the busy weekend.

Tanya, I only hope your dreams are as peaceful as your face.

Your Papa

Erik

Truth in Blogging

Looking back on the 8th of February.

We had described the rough days we had on our return. I just uploaded the pictures I have to remind us of the first clash of wills. I only have mental images of the 3 A.M. test of wills with Christina, but I do have the aftermath recorded.

In these pictures you will see the cute little girl and the damage she did to her 2nd bedroom door, the first one she destroyed. You will also see the door as it stands today. Then we have the parental badges of courage, now healed, the abuse the parents took those first few days. I hope they don't have rabies, those little teeth are sharp!

We have been warned that just because these day have past, doesn't mean they are gone. We stand ready for the next blow.

Erik